Farnilflan is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, dishonourable rhinoceros.

Farnilflan created the Small Magellanic Cloud two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Farnilflan, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Farnilflan, it will make you grow a tail.

Farnilflan's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Farnilflan's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about gravity near squirrels while wearing magenta shoes and balancing seven lead spheres on your back.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Pray towards the north.

4. Voles are unholy and should not be approached.

5. You must never eat parsnips.