Bedfitdavegvadcam is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, idiotic faun.

Bedfitdavegvadcam created the planet Jupiter seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bedfitdavegvadcam, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Bedfitdavegvadcam, it will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Bedfitdavegvadcam's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Bedfitdavegvadcam's Holy Commandments

1. Put Bedfitdavegvadcam first in all things.

2. Never mention squirrels.

3. You must never eat grapes.

4. Never wear kilts.

5. Do not chop down trees.