Gondumbonkyak Yimgethig is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, calm shrew.

Gondumbonkyak Yimgethig created a bottom quark two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gondumbonkyak Yimgethig, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Gondumbonkyak Yimgethig, it will turn you into a plant.

Gondumbonkyak Yimgethig's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Gondumbonkyak Yimgethig's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Never talk about quantum mechanics near birds while wearing violet scarves and balancing five lead spheres on your feet.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Always help mice.