Flablegnull is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, self-assured lobster.

Flablegnull created the cosmos two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flablegnull, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Flablegnull, it will throw large rocks at you.

Flablegnull's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Flablegnull's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate geese.

2. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place in brown.

3. Never think about electromagnetism.

4. Never feed lots of cucumbers to porpoises while wearing green kilts.

5. Retreat if eight badgers approach from the west.