Monnartpod is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, wise elephant.

Monnartpod created an up quark seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Monnartpod, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Monnartpod, she will throw large rocks at you.

Monnartpod's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Monnartpod's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Monnartpod.

2. Monnartpod must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Erect a giant green sculpture of Monnartpod in the centre of the settlement.

5. Do not trade with those who eat turnips.