Nillveennill Futjopfetduss is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, self-assured newt.

Nillveennill Futjopfetduss created the planet Jupiter two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nillveennill Futjopfetduss, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Nillveennill Futjopfetduss, she will destroy your home galaxy.

Nillveennill Futjopfetduss' most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Nillveennill Futjopfetduss' Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear silicon on your body.

2. Do not speak about beans.

3. Always look after injured squirrels.

4. You must never eat wheat.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.