Podtarpvonkjopbasspom is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, able ferret.

Podtarpvonkjopbasspom created bats two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Podtarpvonkjopbasspom, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Podtarpvonkjopbasspom, she will destroy your favourite solar system.

Podtarpvonkjopbasspom's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Podtarpvonkjopbasspom's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate dogs.

3. Never talk about optics near nematodes while wearing mauve skirts.

4. Never eat coconuts.

5. Never write about quantum field theory.