Biftipsid is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, boastful turtle.

Biftipsid created the universe nine million years ago.

If you believe in Biftipsid, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Biftipsid, he will be very unhappy.

Biftipsid's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Biftipsid's Holy Commandments

1. Put Biftipsid first in all things.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate aardvarks.

4. Do not kill mice.

5. Always obey Biftipsid's priests.