Raptimjap is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, slow dingo.

Raptimjap created an up quark three million years ago.

If you believe in Raptimjap, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Raptimjap, it will destroy your favourite planet.

Raptimjap's most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Raptimjap's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of cherries to birds while wearing purple coats.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Always help frogs in need.

4. Never talk about galaxies.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate ducks.