Linfossven is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, competent lobster.

Linfossven created the Cigar Galaxy six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Linfossven, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Linfossven, she will turn you into a duck.

Linfossven's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Linfossven's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Do not speak about turnips.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.