Citgadrut Nilpodweg Fubrenyog is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, merciful chicken.

Citgadrut Nilpodweg Fubrenyog created dark energy seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Citgadrut Nilpodweg Fubrenyog, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Citgadrut Nilpodweg Fubrenyog, he will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Citgadrut Nilpodweg Fubrenyog's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Citgadrut Nilpodweg Fubrenyog's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry doves.

2. Never hurt mites.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Do not wear titanium on your body.

5. Draw representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.