Tenquagflig is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, fussy fairy.

Tenquagflig created Asia eight million years ago.

If you believe in Tenquagflig, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Tenquagflig, it will strike you with lightening.

Tenquagflig's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Tenquagflig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Never feed aubergines to dolphins while wearing trousers.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Always treat frogs with great respect.