Arfzancep is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, sage snail.

Arfzancep created life five billion years ago.

If you believe in Arfzancep, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Arfzancep, she will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Arfzancep's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Arfzancep's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Run away from yellow mice, for they are unholy.

5. Never feed bread to snails while wearing corsets.