Kardinqueeghatsadpodvonpit is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, prudent yak.

Kardinqueeghatsadpodvonpit created energy two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kardinqueeghatsadpodvonpit, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Kardinqueeghatsadpodvonpit, he will turn you into a plant.

Kardinqueeghatsadpodvonpit's most sacred site is Inshas in Egypt.

Kardinqueeghatsadpodvonpit's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Pray towards the west.

4. Always help tapirs.

5. Do not shave your legs.