Rowbenquill is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, all-knowing armadillo.

Rowbenquill created the Sun two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Rowbenquill, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Rowbenquill, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Rowbenquill's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Rowbenquill's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Always obey Rowbenquill's priests.

4. Never wear green kilts.

5. Never pour water over plants.