Kannelkingam is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, humane swan.

Kannelkingam created a top quark five million years ago.

If you believe in Kannelkingam, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Kannelkingam, he will turn you into a hamster.

Kannelkingam's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Kannelkingam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Do not trade with those who eat oranges.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Never write about comets.