Quagdunsaw is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, merciless manatee.

Quagdunsaw created the Small Magellanic Cloud five million years ago.

If you believe in Quagdunsaw, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Quagdunsaw, she will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Quagdunsaw's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Quagdunsaw's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt voles.

2. Put Quagdunsaw first in all things.

3. Never think ill of sick turtles.

4. Never talk about dwarf planets.

5. Never hurt frogs.