Kemmetdun is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, merciless mole.

Kemmetdun created the solar system nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kemmetdun, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Kemmetdun, he will send minions to preach to you.

Kemmetdun's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Kemmetdun's Holy Commandments

1. Learn three new languages a year.

2. Never write about spacetime.

3. Pray towards the east.

4. Do not wear cyan clothing.

5. Always look after injured snakes.