Vandappang is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, calm tapir.

Vandappang created the Andromeda Galaxy eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vandappang, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Vandappang, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Vandappang's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Vandappang's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Hide if six swans approach from the east.