Yattcubfitpom is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, intelligent scorpion.

Yattcubfitpom created oxygen six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yattcubfitpom, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Yattcubfitpom, she will ignore you and hope you go away.

Yattcubfitpom's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Yattcubfitpom's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Never write about black holes.

3. Always help dogs in need.

4. Squirrels are not to be trusted.

5. Do not covet oxen.