Dubnilmabstafzogripriltaf is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, stupid spider.

Dubnilmabstafzogripriltaf created light two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dubnilmabstafzogripriltaf, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Dubnilmabstafzogripriltaf, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Dubnilmabstafzogripriltaf's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Dubnilmabstafzogripriltaf's Holy Commandments

1. Dubnilmabstafzogripriltaf loves badgers, so they must be respected.

2. Never think about photosynthesis.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Never sit near foxes.

5. Never write about fluid mechanics.