Zakfempopart is a god.

She takes the form of a slender, narcissistic owl.

Zakfempopart created water nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zakfempopart, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Zakfempopart, she will turn you into an amoeba.

Zakfempopart's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Zakfempopart's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Run away if five moths approach from the south.

3. Never sing in holy places.

4. Put Zakfempopart first in all things.

5. You must never eat nuts.