Hadlenfet is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, pitiless mouse.

Hadlenfet created vertebrates six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hadlenfet, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Hadlenfet, she will turn you into a worm.

Hadlenfet's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Hadlenfet's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from turquoise mites for they are unholy.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Hadlenfet.

3. Erect nine zinc sculptures of Hadlenfet on top of important buildings.

4. Never bounce near seals.

5. Always take life seriously.