Zodarndun Volgepwat is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, unsympathetic penguin.

Zodarndun Volgepwat created Asia four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zodarndun Volgepwat, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Zodarndun Volgepwat, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Zodarndun Volgepwat's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Zodarndun Volgepwat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Always treat sharks with great respect.

3. Never think about optics.

4. Run away if four bats approach from the south.

5. Never think ill of sick nematodes.