Nullgig is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, generous monkey.

Nullgig created a Higgs boson two years ago.

If you believe in Nullgig, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Nullgig, she will destroy your favourite solar system.

Nullgig's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Nullgig's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if five pigs approach from the north.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Never think about quantum field theory.

5. Erect a giant gold sculpture of Nullgig in the centre of the settlement.