Bunquatpag is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, merciful walrus.

Bunquatpag created Europe nine million years ago.

If you believe in Bunquatpag, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Bunquatpag, he will be mildly annoyed.

Bunquatpag's most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Bunquatpag's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry eagles.

2. Never think about stars.

3. Sheep are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Never hurt ants.

5. Run away if three otters approach from the east.