Zakstigstik is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, duplicitous cat.

Zakstigstik created the Tadpole Galaxy six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zakstigstik, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Zakstigstik, he will turn you into a sparrow.

Zakstigstik's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Zakstigstik's Holy Commandments

1. Never sing near great tits.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Never hurt bats.

4. Gulls are not to be trusted.

5. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place in gray.