Nurtbugdubligbatbissan is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, all-powerful mole.

Nurtbugdubligbatbissan created a strange quark eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nurtbugdubligbatbissan, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Nurtbugdubligbatbissan, he will turn you into a duck.

Nurtbugdubligbatbissan's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Nurtbugdubligbatbissan's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Never talk about cell theory.

4. Never mention porpoises.

5. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Nurtbugdubligbatbissan on top of all buildings.