Cissfembon is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, charitable dolphin.

Cissfembon created the Sol system four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cissfembon, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Cissfembon, he will turn you into a rat.

Cissfembon's most sacred site is Troms in Norway.

Cissfembon's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about deoxyribonucleic acid.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Never wear cyan jumpers.

4. Never feed lots of turnips to turtles while wearing indigo stockings.

5. Never feed cherries to snails while wearing white tights.