Matzakflat is a god.
He takes the form of a thin, uncaring
dove.
Matzakflat created energy eighteen thousand years ago.
If you believe in
Matzakflat, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.
If you do not believe in
Matzakflat, he will turn you into a sparrow.
Matzakflat's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.
Matzakflat's Holy Commandments1. Never eat bark.
2. You must pray to Matzakflat nine times a day.
3. Erect a giant purple sculpture of Matzakflat in the centre of the settlement.
4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Matzakflat.
5. Do not dye your hair gray.