Labwitpop is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, awesome ferret.

Labwitpop created dark matter seven million years ago.

If you believe in Labwitpop, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Labwitpop, he will attempt to scare you with floods.

Labwitpop's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Labwitpop's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if nine sharks approach from the south.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Labwitpop loves hamsters, so they must be honoured.

5. Never sit in holy places.