Gumhubtailmap is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, clever lobster.

Gumhubtailmap created a top quark three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gumhubtailmap, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Gumhubtailmap, he will turn you into a sheep.

Gumhubtailmap's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Gumhubtailmap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of tin.

2. Gumhubtailmap loves otters, so they must be respected.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Gumhubtailmap.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate shrews.