Bitpitdav is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, humorless jackal.

Bitpitdav created silver eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bitpitdav, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Bitpitdav, it will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Bitpitdav's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Bitpitdav's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no geese in a building before entering it.

2. Never chant in holy places.

3. Do not hurt mites.

4. Never feed rice to swans while wearing mauve tights.

5. You must pray to Bitpitdav nine times a day.