Nakgonkop is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, merciful donkey.

Nakgonkop created everything that exists eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nakgonkop, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Nakgonkop, he will turn you into a small brown duck.

Nakgonkop's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Nakgonkop's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Always help bats in need.

3. Do not wear silicon on your body.

4. Never think about ultrasonics.

5. Always stare at clouds.