Pinbonved is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, confident newt.

Pinbonved created the Cigar Galaxy nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pinbonved, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Pinbonved, he will turn you into a rat.

Pinbonved's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Pinbonved's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from turquoise ants, for they are unholy.

2. Cats are not to be trusted.

3. Do not hurt capybaras.

4. Never skip near foxes.

5. Never talk about quantum gravity near swans while wearing blue hats and balancing four carbon spheres on your neck.