Mismegquatsan is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, almighty elephant.

Mismegquatsan created a bottom quark seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Mismegquatsan, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Mismegquatsan, she will turn you into a rat.

Mismegquatsan's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Mismegquatsan's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Mismegquatsan seven times a day.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Never write about galaxies.

5. Run away from magenta birds, for they are unholy.