Rut is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, omnipotent slug.

Rut created humanity seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Rut, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Rut, he will turn you into a hamster.

Rut's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Rut's Holy Commandments

1. Rut loves ants, so they must be honoured.

2. Do not keep seven goats in a large pit.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Rut.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Never wear violet boots.