Lamnurl is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, awesome dolphin.

Lamnurl created a charm quark five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Lamnurl, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Lamnurl, she will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Lamnurl's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Lamnurl's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about thermodynamics.

2. Do not drink water in red rooms.

3. Do not wear nickel on your body.

4. You must love Lamnurl.

5. Always take life seriously.