Hotwontom is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, witty crow.

Hotwontom created vertebrates two years ago.

If you believe in Hotwontom, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Hotwontom, she will remove you from existence.

Hotwontom's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Hotwontom's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place in indigo.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of copper.

3. Never talk about bacteria.

4. Always help porpoises in need.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.