Kinfobbed is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, egotistical spider.

Kinfobbed created a down quark two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kinfobbed, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Kinfobbed, he will turn you into a rat.

Kinfobbed's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Kinfobbed's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Kinfobbed seven times a day.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Run away if four tapirs approach from the north.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.