Jipmutjip is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, contented shark.

Jipmutjip created bats three billion years ago.

If you believe in Jipmutjip, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Jipmutjip, it will turn you into a snail.

Jipmutjip's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Jipmutjip's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from mauve tortoises for they are unholy.

2. Always look after injured otters.

3. Never think about chromosomes.

4. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.