Ontfagjip is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, self-assured mink.

Ontfagjip created Mount Everest eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ontfagjip, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Ontfagjip, it will strike you with lightening.

Ontfagjip's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Ontfagjip's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured voles.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

4. Never think about moons.

5. Feed all hungry geese.