Yarkarwig is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, selfish guinea pig.

Yarkarwig created an atom eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yarkarwig, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Yarkarwig, it will attempt to scare you with floods.

Yarkarwig's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Yarkarwig's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed limes to shrews while wearing violet coats.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Yarkarwig must be the most important thing in your life.