Cinsitjarn is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, happy gerbil.

Cinsitjarn created Mount Everest nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cinsitjarn, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Cinsitjarn, it will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Cinsitjarn's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Cinsitjarn's Holy Commandments

1. Cinsitjarn loves manatees, so they must be respected.

2. Never think about fluid mechanics.

3. Feed all hungry foxes.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Do not speak about nuts.