Tagdidlakjat is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, kind gorilla.

Tagdidlakjat created the Milkyway two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tagdidlakjat, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Tagdidlakjat, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Tagdidlakjat's most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Tagdidlakjat's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no cats in a building before entering it.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of platinum.

4. Never wear magenta ear rings.

5. Always obey Tagdidlakjat's priests.