Flowrawquam is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, almighty salamander.

Flowrawquam created gold six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flowrawquam, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Flowrawquam, he will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Flowrawquam's most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Flowrawquam's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Always help sick pigs.

3. Never feed aubergines to sheep while wearing yellow jumpers.

4. Never think about dark energy near shrews while wearing pink boots and balancing seven zinc spheres on your hands.

5. Do not dye your hair black.