Titbassweg is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, quiet dove.

Titbassweg created gold four million years ago.

If you believe in Titbassweg, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Titbassweg, he will try to impress you with rainbows.

Titbassweg's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Titbassweg's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your chest brown.

2. Never wear jumpers.

3. Never talk about optics near ants while wearing violet shirts and balancing nine silicon spheres on your legs.

4. Always help mites.

5. Always take life seriously.