Botartrat is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, sage mouse.

Botartrat created dark energy three billion years ago.

If you believe in Botartrat, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Botartrat, it will turn you into a rock.

Botartrat's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Botartrat's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Do not kill manatees.

3. Never write about amino acids.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Botartrat.

5. Botartrat loves pigs, so they must be honoured.