Quillvanmif is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, flying hyena.

Quillvanmif created the planet Earth two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Quillvanmif, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Quillvanmif, it will turn you into a slug.

Quillvanmif's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Quillvanmif's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Hide from green dolphins for they are unholy.

3. Do not eat onions.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.