Dissinmeg is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, humorless chinchilla.

Dissinmeg created a down quark seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dissinmeg, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Dissinmeg, he will turn you into a goat.

Dissinmeg's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Dissinmeg's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Never think about comets.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Never wear pink hats.

5. Never think about spacetime near mites while wearing violet shirts and balancing six titanium spheres on your arms.